How would "Dee-Feesh" pick up a Marine Dollar?

Statistically, this post has a 99.9999 percent chance of needing correction.
That exact percent is the absolute best-guess, estimate, of the worlds
greatest statistics guru. (As passed along to me via imagination.) When
you subtract that amount from 100 you have the probability that Mr. Feesh
has already received his Marine Corps dollar.

Already received his dollar? You jest? Oh contraire, the Reef is not short
for reefer, it's short for bull shit. But, I digress. Mr. Feesh being the
wise innovator knows the value of coin collecting. He speculates that the
value of the Marine Corps dollar will increase over time. He imagines that
the US Mint will issue other service coins and that collections will be put
together by members of the armed services, past and present. Mr. Feesh
would be remiss to forego the opportunity to lord it over on anyone willing
to listen to his condescending voice as it proudly proclaims that his
collection includes the Marine Corps dollars.

Imagine, you're out on a live aboard for ten days and Mr. Feesh is there
boasting about his fine collection of prized US dollars from the US Mint,
including the Marine Corps proof and uncirculated. You're saying to
yourself, even if I had the same dollars old Reefie would not listen to me.
He'd be busy talking his jive talk and not listen to a word you said. How
true. But, not to worry, the other passengers would know you also have the
Marine Corps dollars and they would realize how truly full of shit Mr. Feesh
can be; statistically speaking, of course.

Now that you know why Dee Feesh bought the Marine Corps dollar, don't you
think you should buy one too? Even if your not planning the live aboard
experience, you should get one to keep up on rec.scuba. After all,
rec.scuba and Marine Corps dollars are what this life is all about. (In
that order.)

The Last Challenge (In Memory of Icediver)
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1. ben bradlee Dec 13 2002, 2:45 pm show options

Newsgroups: rec.scuba
From: "ben bradlee" <kjohn...@splitrocktel.net> - Find messages by this
author
Date: Fri, 13 Dec 2002 12:43:42 -0600
Local: Fri, Dec 13 2002 2:43 pm
Subject: The Last Challenge (In Memory of Icediver)
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With the sudden, unexpected, and unexplained demise of Icediver, the
Popeye-Icediver dive-challenge is now history. While nonsense reverberates
on rec.scuba, it seems appropriate, even fitting, that a new and greater
challenge be offered.


As long as I can remember there has been a steady posting of insults,
derogatory remarks, innuendo, personal attacks, and professional criticism
of Icediver. How long this has gone on is anyone's guess, but I suspect
that Icediver has been belittled, harassed, criticized and otherwise
degraded thousands of times in his existence on rec.scuba. (After, as
well.)


The Challenge: All Icediver bashers are entered in this challenge. The
object is to determine who amongst you posted the greatest number of
insults. The time starts with the first insult (you will need to document
that date) and ends with this post. Each person is responsible to count his
or her own insults. Be liberal with yourself. Insults to him, his family,
friends, education, abilities, or judgment surely count if they are made to
discredit him or something he said. Remarks on sheep, Velcro, buoying dive
sites, diving without fins, Orcas, and the myriad of other subjects engaging
angry responses count. Don't just count sentences since you may have
several insults in each sentence (or words that represent a sentence.)
(Remember, we are trying to come up with the number of insults, not the
number of complete sentences or words spelled correctly.) Each person is
responsible for his or her own count but you may want to check another
contestant to keep him or her honest.


Plan to meet at the appointed time to share your final tally. You can post
your preliminary total to this message if you want, but you should be
present to support your final total and accept the credit you so rightfully
deserve. There will be prizes for first strike, last strike, and greatest
assault (highest number.) And remember, there are no multipoint insults.
Each insult counts only as one. It would be far too difficult to determine
a point scale for the most cutting, most hurtful, most disgusting, or
similar category. As for pictures, well, only one point per picture please.


At the ceremony everyone will not be of like mind as to the fate of
Icediver. This is to be expected given the great diversity of opinion in
rec.scuba. If you score the highest count, you can choose whether your
posts: 1. Encouraged a suicide, 2. Degraded enough to silence, or, 3.
Bolstered a natural passing. (Each insult could represent one strike on a
nail securing his coffin cover. Say 10 strikes per nail. Then divide your
total to determine the number of coffin nails to your credit. Some fun,
eh?)


Maybe it will be clearer once the numbers are known. A hundred insults? A
thousand insults? Chipping at the ego, weighing on the soul, each lowering
the stature of man, every man. Surely the winner will have no trouble
selecting a winning category. First and last strikers can choose a category
to their liking. (Each category can be selected more than once.)


I did not know Icediver. In retrospect, I should have. In my quest to be
anonymous I lost the ability to know; as in make friends. I did talk to
Icediver one sunny and peaceful day. He acted professional, talked like he
posted, while he helping others to accomplish their goals. I, like you,
read many of his posts but failed to respond with the hateful retorts
necessary to be a contestant in this challenge. But here on rec.scuba we're
free to be ourselves, right? That's why I thought you would like this
challenge. Now step up to your posts and take a critical review. Is Doug
the man to beat? (Wouldn't it be ironic if Doug wins this contest when
there was so little hope of him winning the original challenge?) Your
celebration will be a final tribute to Icediver and his original challenge.
May the last challenge begin!


2. Popeye Dec 13 2002, 4:47 pm show options

Newsgroups: rec.scuba
From: buzcutt...@aol.com (Popeye) - Find messages by this author
Date: 13 Dec 2002 20:47:35 GMT
Local: Fri, Dec 13 2002 4:47 pm
Subject: Re: The Last Challenge (In Memory of Icediver)
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>From: "ben bradlee" kjohn...@splitrocktel.net Date: 12/13/02 1:43 PM
>Eastern Standard Time Message-id: <uvkallpcj31...@corp.supernews.com>


<snip some whining tripe from a lost little lamb>

Does this mean that if I still wanna piss on his grave, pissing into Lake
Michigan will suffice?


Popeye
It may be that your sole purpose in life
is simply to serve as warning to others.

"Douglas W. "Popeye" Frederick" <Buzcutt454@aol.com> wrote in message
news:11h18b59nkb9s32@news.supernews.com...

http://groups.google.com/group/rec.s...1ac4b4366eab89
7d/773ecfcc7ebfc34b

This thread shows Bill Keacham, Jack Chambill, just two of Blacks
personalitites that he had conversations with himself with, because he had
to make up friends.

As you read through this thread you'll see where Black danced on the grave
of, and used the death of Bobby McGuire in ways only he would.

And in ways, I will add, that no one has used his. This is just one example,
the guy was far more abusive and arrogant to others than anyone was to him.

No wonder KennyBenny takes his side.

And, of course, you see the ongoing brilliance of that internet bully mal
grande/coward/ brain surgeon Connell.

Black has no expectation of sympathy or respect coming from anyone.

Here is the classic from Billy W:

----- Original Message -----
From: <b...@v3.com.au>
To: <techdi...@aquanaut.com>
Sent: Thursday, October 26, 2000 12:42 AM
Subject: The Best of Dr Michael J Black

Let's have a look at some of the Best of Dr Michael J Black...

Black (a non trimix diver), on the safest deep-diving project in the
world...

> > At 01:38 16/02/00 , Michael J. Black wrote:
> >(WKPP divers are going to get hurt, and are lucky to have made it this
> >far

Black - on choosing the right boat for technical diving....

> At 01:15 1/03/00 , mjblac...@yahoo.com wrote:
> >as a fellow boat owner I too frown upon doubles in my boat.
> >If I wore my double steel 112's, I would break my boat ladder

Black, on the drawbacks of doubles...

> At 07:40 31/05/00 , Michael J Black wrote:
> >Do you techno-weenies have a clue how despised you
> >are by some boat captains, with all your gear clanging around?

> Black, on the agencies that killed most tech divers...

> At 08:12 16/05/00 , mjblac...@yahoo.com wrote:
> > The agencies that have been in the business longest have enviable
> > safety records, a testimonial to their quality of instruction, given
> > the inherent dangers involved in scuba.

Black, on the benefits of precarious gear rigging...

> At 11:23 8/11/99 , Michael J. Black wrote:
> > My preference is to not clip the SPG to my left hip or chest D-rings. I
> > prefer to tuck the SPG on a long hose into my butt crack. That's right,
> > between my legs, in the butt crack, which cradles the thing nicely, and
I
> > know where it is at all times by feel.

Black "If I can't dive without a computer no-one else should"...

> At 12:59 25/07/00 , Dr Michael J. Black wrote:
> >While we're on the subject of DIR, here are a few more of my "esteemed"
> >objections: No computer (HELLO??!!),

Black - A Dive Legend In His Own Mind...

> At 13:07 16/05/00 , MJB wrote:
> > As for my diving credentials, they've been posted too, but
> > let's just say I dive alot (over twenty years, and 1000 logged dives
> > in the last ten) and in fact, I'm going diving tonight after work.

Black, on why he is an ignorant little drip-tray...

> At 02:12 26/05/00 , Michael J. Black wrote:
> >I am not trimix-certified

Since he pretends to be an authority on mix diving, let's have that one
again...

> At 02:12 26/05/00 , Michael J. Black wrote:
> > I am not trimix-certified

Black's alternative to intelligent gear rigging...

> At 03:07 26/07/00 , Michael J. Black wrote:
> > As for better systems, mine works well and is quite simple: no dives
> > below 220 feet, using a large primary, a 30cf (or 40cf) pony, and
> > 40cf sling bottle(s) if needed. No doubles, and no dives that require
> > more than 45 minutes of deco

Black, on hanging seven pieces of equipment off the HP hose...

> At 11:23 8/11/99 , Michael J. Black wrote:
> > I often have to reach for the SPG (which is mounted to a console, that
> > has a compass, knife, scissors, computer, slate, depth gauge, pencil)
> > mainly to read my compass. My usual diving is in freshwater lakes in
> > Wisconsin, with poor visibility (yesterday vis was 3 feet in Lake
Mendota,
> > Madison, WI) and I rely on my compass for underwater navigation on a
> > regular basis.

Black knows better than the US Navy...

> At 10:49 1/02/00 , Michael J. Black wrote:
> > Thanks for posting the Navy info. Frankly that is amazing, and makes
> > me wonder who's making the rules in the U.S. Navy.

Black, on how to choose the right regulator (like, ask someone who's
sponsored by a reg manufacturer)...

> At 04:49 16/02/00 , Michael J. Black wrote:
> > Simon L Hartley <shart...@scu.edu.au> wrote:
> > > Is the R190 actually a better performing reg than the D400?

> > This would be a great question for Jim Bowden, who currently holds
> > the world depth record on open-circuit Scuba. Having spoken with
> > him personally about this, I can tell you that he likes both regs

Black on "to be as stupid as me, learn from the worst in the business..."

> At 01:48 1/06/00 , Michael J. Black wrote:
> > As for my "extreme ignornat stupidity" were you referring to the pony
> > bottle with pO2 1.9 debate? Thought so, and just FYI here is what TDI
> > says in one of their coursebooks (authored I believe by Jan Neal, who
> > IS a BEST diver, i.e. absent from this list):
> > "A small volume scuba cylinder of EAN39 carried with a diver for a
> > decompression gas can also be a redundant gas supply. In the event
> > that the primary gas supply is exhausted, the diver can switch to
> > EAN39 and make a normal ascent. If this emergency occurred at 130 fsw,
> > the pO2 for EAN39 would be 1.92 ATA.

Black boasts coyly about his deep air experience...

> At 02:12 26/05/00 , Michael J. Black wrote:
> > I will not divulge how deep I have been on air, as if I haven't been
> > crucified enough already.

Black forgets he just boasted coyly about his deep air experience...

> At 02:12 26/05/00 , Michael J. Black wrote:
> > I am not trimix-certified, and believe it or not, one reason is I have
> > an objection to TDI's requirement that Extended Range (on air) precede
> > Trimix.

Black on diving medicine - "Ignore the Pros. Trust Me Instead. I'm A
Hobbyist"...

> At 02:12 26/05/00 , Michael J. Black wrote:
> > Diving medicine has been a second hobby, and I have
> > been fortunate to have learned from some experts, whose names have
> > already been bashed on this list, so keep guessing.

Black, the truly clueless, never lets ignorance hold him back...

> At 23:09 28/04/00 , Michael J. Black wrote:
> > If you're going to dive Hogarthian, the long hose (5 or 7-foot)
> > should go under the right arm and around the neck. This makes
> > sense in caves, for air sharing.
> > In wrecks, I have a problem with it in that the length of hose
> > represents an entanglement hazard. I prefer a 40-inch primary
> > hose, and recommend bungying your long octo to your tank(s), or
> > even diving with a 40-inch octo hose realizing that your buddy's
> > going to have to ride your ass in an air-sharing emergency.

Black, on not knowing shit from clay...

> At 12:59 25/07/00 , Dr Michael J. Black wrote:
> > While we're on the subject of DIR, here are a few more of my "esteemed"
> > objections: Scubapro regulators (do you turds know we call these
> > Scubaflows in cold water, and I mean icy cold). Want
> > a better system? Start over, unless cave diving is your only diving.

Black "You need lots of dive experience to talk to me (cause I don't have
any)"...

> At 02:32 19/07/00 , Michael J. Black wrote:
> > You're a wannabe, lying, sniveling, loudmouthed, ranting POS, DIR's
> > poster boy. Suck it up, weenie. Or better yet, try logging a few
dives,
> > puppy. MJB

Black finally demonstrates his true level of diving expertise. Fish
feeding...

> > What is good to use. Someone suggested cheese-wiz, but this seems a
> > bit unearthy to me. Any comments on this.
> > Well if you must know, Nabisco Easy Cheese. It comes in a can and
> > withstands the hydrostatic pressure from descent, if you get to dive
> > besides snorkel on your trip.
> > Mike Black

Thanks for the laughs, buttcrack

rgds billyw

ps If any of you would like to supply the gems of buttcrack's ignorance
that you have collected, send 'em in. I'll compile and repost 'em here and
on rec.scuba. This moron should have a warning label attached.